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13 years 3 months
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Recent Comments

Date Title Body
I present his wife as…

I present his wife as Exhibit A. 

Count de Money

Count de Money

I've always thought of him…

I've always thought of him as Don Cornelius. Maybe the Soul Train and the  Polar Express have merged. 

 

 

If he didn't want to go home…

If he didn't want to go home empty handed he should have conducted his calls empty handed. 

Dono? I dunno who that is. 

Dono? I dunno who that is. 

During his appearance on…

During his appearance on WOSU’s All Sides with Anna Staver on Thursday, Staver asked Smith if Ohio State’s three-game losing streak to Michigan “deserves a little bit of an asterisk since for at least two of those years, it appears they were cheating.”

The All Sides show. Yeah. It's just dripping with nuance. 

The "yer out" MLB game on…

The "yer out" MLB game on Intellevision was great fun. The Intellevision NFL game was probably the best video football game until the first Madden. (Yes, it was better than Tecmo Bowl.)

I've got a handy dandy PS3…

I've got a handy dandy PS3 and just finished Borderlands 2. Loved it. 

"Oh, Sparty, I apologize. I…

"Oh, Sparty, I apologize. I forgot you were there."

What if the couch transfers…

What if the couch transfers to WVU?

In Columbus did Ryan Day,A…

In Col-um-bus did Ryan Day,
A stately toilet bowl decree...

Kelly fills his dance card…

Kelly fills his dance card with those that love football.

These City Connect uniforms…

These City Connect uniforms demean us all. 

(No subject)
No idea? That'll get you…

No idea? That'll get you sent to the Eastern front. 

Ooh, ooh!

Ooh, ooh!

Ivan Drago, come on down!

Ivan Drago, come on down!

Tom Brady was the seventh QB…

Tom Brady was the seventh QB off the board, so JJ's got him beat. 

What's interesting about him…

What's interesting about him is he's not a ccntentious hot-takey loudmouth--he's just wrong a lot. 

Whenever anyone talks about…

Whenever anyone talks about the guy's combine numbers first, you know it's a bad pick. 

If you trade up into the top…

If you trade up into the top 10 of a draft to get a good quarterback, as opposed to a field-tilting quarterback,...

He's not just mad, he's disingenuous, too. They moved up one spot and gave up just a 4th and 5th. They didn't mortgage their future on him. 

I agree about Williams. As…

I agree about Williams. As for Rattler, he's someone who I'd love my team taking in the fifth round. 

Speaking of the Peter…

Speaking of the Peter Principal, I have a Pete Prisco Principle (he's the bright CBS fellow who gave it a C+): if takes one side, then the other side is the place to be. He was wrong about us all through last season. 

Were I a Vikes fan, I'd be…

Were I a Vikes fan, I'd be going nuts with "Oh, J.J." gifs from The Cannonball Run. That's assuming that the Minnesota message boards can handle gifs, of course. 

In Penix's defense is our…

Our defense is Penix's defense--nobody could hang with Mikey and the gang. 

What makes it a bad pick is he went too  high to a team that had no right drafting a QB. 

I don't think the best QB of…

I don't think the best QB of all time is gonna go at #27 this time, though.

I noticed we picked up two…

I noticed we picked up two more CBs for OT Avery Gach on Monday. Since they come from Sparty and Buckeye insiders, they're clearly not just bait for the benighted.

Cleveland, city of lights,…

Cleveland, city of lights, city of magic...

+1 for sound idea, +1,000…

+1 for sound idea, +1,000 for use of lorgnette. 

They got a name for the…

They got a name for the winners in the world,
And I want a name when I lose,
They call Ann Arbor the Wolverines...

Dear XM Claus, I would like…

Dear XM Claus, 

I would like a '24 Bronco Heritage Edition in shadow black because I like Fords and I think it looks fantastic. That's probably the worst reasoning ever provided on a gearhead thread, but I'm a simple man. The world is a better place if old English majors don't change their own oil. 

"Aztec ugly" is a wonderful…

"Aztec ugly" is a wonderful phrase. All the automotive atrociousness in the world packed into two simple words. Bravo. 

ps I kinda like the Gladiator myself. 

The can would be labeled…

The can would be labeled just "Commit." No telling what kind of commit is inside. 

It's the best fit for him…

It's the best fit for him among the teams likely to draft a QB early. 

Maybe OP was using Sparty…

Maybe OP was using Sparty sporty wifi with Mels B, C & T. 

Leave the door open for…

Leave the door open for Elijah and leave some haroset for ol’ S.D. Goy. 

I hate that this means the…

I hate that this means the Blue Jackets will be getting another Wolverine. 

(No subject)

How do you feel, Roddy?

"You kids don't know Grand…

"You kids don't know Grand Funk? The wild shirtless lyrics of Mark Farner? The bong-rattling bass of Mel Schacher? The competent drumwork of Don Brewer? Oh, man!"

So you don't feel like Pete…

So you don't feel like Pete does? I'm cool with that.

The only folks I really need in off the list are Tull, Supertramp and the B-52s. 

And let's not forget Stavros…

And let's not forget Stavros from Kojak! He was Telly's younger brother!

I saw "Dusty may work" and…

I saw "Dusty may work" and.immediately thought "Dinah Moe Humm." The phrases have the same number of letters and a similar sound, I guess, but I gather I'm not right in the head.

Heck, I'd have seconds then…

Heck, I'd have seconds then polish it off with a tall, cool Budweiser. 

OMG, XM has been unmasked as…

OMG, XM has been unmasked as Jack Horkheimer: Star Hustler. 

I was a varsity tackle and a…

I was a Michigan tackle and a hell of a block,
When I played in Columbus
I made the Toilet rock...

Every Saturday noon,
I felt the fever grow,
Stroud knows what it's like,
No gold pants and no place to go. 

Er, I was told Michigan was…

Er, I was told Michigan was never getting another recruit and we fans should live out the remainder of our miserable M lives listening to maudlin music and reading 11W. What am I supposed to do with all these Morrissey albums and links to Buckeye tentacle porn?

I heard Sparty did a nice…

I heard Sparty did a nice job stretching. 

I love it when a team comes…

I love it when a team comes together. 

--Scipio Africanus Smith

Nope. I'm Jerame Tuman. 

Nope. I'm Jerame Tuman.