MGoBlog Glossary of Terms and Memes

If you're new to this site or the boards use this page to familiarize yourself with some of the site-specific terms thrown around here (we'll try to limit these on front page content). I broke these off from the FAQ because the list had grown too long to be valuable there.

27 for 27 When Fitzgerald Toussaint ran for 27 yards on 27 carries against Penn State in the dumbest football game ever played.

3-9 Mark Dantonio's birthday. Also corresponds to the wins (3) and losses (9) Michigan State had in 2016.

4-8 Notre Dame went this.

AIRBHG Angry Iowa Running Back Hating God. The most wrathful position-hating god in the pantheon, inspired by Angry Michigan Safety Hating God.

ARO=America's Rollout Out. The play-action zone stretch rollout out pattern that every freshman quarterback can throw against soft coverage.

Bolivia Board jargon for banned poster, from "negged to bolivian," meaning oblivion.

Bo Ryan Index (BRI): the percentage of photos in the first three rows of that person's Google image search in which they look enraged, incredulous, furious, or are expressing something otherwise unpleasant.

Bo Ryan's BRI is 94%.

This is reported in a percentage on our basketball lineup cards. Variants: Johnny Jones Index (% of photos are of you at another job), Patrick Ewing Index (as a player), and Chris Collins (% of images that are just that one of you on all fours barking like a dog).

Brady Hoke's Pet Viking Former All American center Steve Everitt, who stands behind Brady Hoke and looks like a viking. Also wears MGoShirts.

Buckle Up A commitment is impending.

CC Coaching change. Message board header prefix during coaching searches.

Cable Subscribers. Rutgers, because the only reason they're here was to make New Yorkers pay to have the Big Ten Network on basic cable.

Cooler Poopers If you don't get it, take the literal meaning and add Ohio State tailgaters. Origin.

Crimes Against Manpanda Running MANBALL ISOs from the I-formation to no or negative effect when you have the world's greatest running QB on your roster. Origin: 2011 disaster vs. Iowa.

Cumong. "Come on!" with gusto.

(The) Daves The 2002 offensive line (Pearson, Baas & Petruziello), or any nondescript group of maulers from the '90s and aughts.

Dennis Bergkamp! Once upon a time in 2010 this one quarterback busted out for 78 yards for a touchdown. Because American Football Commentators are Boring, the preferred method for reliving this moment is set to a Dutch guy calling a Bergkamp goal.

Disrespekt Disrespect that is imagined or a deeper, more serious version of a shoulder chip. Disrespect in a sports context is refusing to acknowledge an enemy that's very good and worked hard to earn a stellar recent run among the elite programs in the nation. When your toddler calls her green play-doh "Blue!", that is "Disrespekt." (Not all rivals can tell the difference).

Dog Groomers The nine-to-five occupation of the people who wrote "In the Big House" despite the presence of a perfectly good band.

Donkeys / Hating donkeys. Donkeys are defensive ends/linebackers/etc. Donkey hate is a kind of burro abuse practiced by excellent offensive linemen.

Dr. Vorax. Greg Robinson's stuffed beaver and spirit animal. The hardest working creature in the animal kingdom. Sometimes makes draft decisions for Heiko.

Facepalm Guy. When the camera panned the student section in UTL1 for an instant react, this fan gave the camera man a no-no-no.

FAKE! All 40 times are fake.

Football Armageddon The 2006 Michigan-Ohio State game.

Fusion Cuisine Originally Al Borges-Denard Fusion Cuisine, but since expanded to refer to any mismatches between coordinator style/player archetypes.

Game...blouses Remember that Chappelle Show skit where Charlie Murphy recalls a pickup basketball game versus Prince and the Revolution, and Prince hangs on the rim and says... It reminds us of Stauskas. 

GERG Term for incompetent person named Greg. Usually Greg Robinson, Michigan's defensive coordinator in 2009-'10, or his Iowa offensive coordinating alterego Greg Davis.

Get Off My Lawn I have been cultivating every blade since 1969 and I'll be hognozzled if some young whippersnappers show the unmitigated gall to trample it like a Buckeye on a banner. What you don't remember that either? /throws up hands.

(The) Happening Nickname for the coaching "search" of 2014 that netted Harbaugh, from the constant "It's Happening!" memes throughout that process (see The Process)

Hennechart Passing chart in Upon Further Review. MGoBlog's system for charting quarterback play, named for the first man to be charted. Abbreviations:

  • DO: Dead-on. Tough, NFL level throw. Difficulty taken into consideration so this may be an accurate ball delivered under duress.
  • CA: Catchable. Run of the mill catchable throw. Screens are noted in parentheses in the chart and not counted in the DSR.
  • SCR: Scramble. Decision to take off that ends with a solid gain or first down.
  • PR: Pressure. Bad or no throw on which QB has no realistic chance to compete a pass because of men trying to kill him. Can't cause this himself.
  • MA: Marginal. Iffy throw that makes catch tougher than it has to be or robs WR of YAC.
  • BA: Batted. Ball knocked down by pass rusher. Also may be used if the QB was knocked down and the ball went to the ground or something.
  • TA: Throwaway. Ball not intended to be complete, or an unproductive pass or attempt to run, or an avoidable sack.
  • IN: Inaccurate. Pass thrown too poorly to be caught.
  • BR: Bad read. Thrown into coverage or a very bad sack or just missing the wide open dude for more yards or doing something silly.
  • DSR: Downfield success rates. The good (DO, CA, SCR) divided by that and the bad (BA, TA, IN, BR)
  • Grade: MGoBlog +/- scoring of pass plays.
  • RPOs: Good reads/all RPO reads.
  • Read: Good option reads/all option reads.

Henri the Otter of Ennui An otter with a French name that rhymes with the proper pronunciation of ennui. Henri appears when the numbness sets in. Origin. Henri has since accumulated a gallery of otter friends and family, including Aurelian the Otter of Win, brother Hank the Otter of Swank, and several unofficialunauthorized and unnecessary  spin-offs.

(The) Horror Think of something so horrifying that could happen to Michigan football that it would thereafter only be referred to as "The Horror." Think of the first thing that an enemy fan will use when they want to give a Michigan fan a taste of what hell must be like. That's "The Horror." Now stop thinking about that and think about how adorable kittens can be. Soooo adorable!

HOWEVA Stephen A. Smith reference; if you don't know, be thankful.

IANAJTTP I am not a journalist, that's the point.

IIRC If I remember correctly

Inside the Crooked Blue Line. The name for our podcast segments with Steve Lorenz. After the SPOOKY Minnesota game in 2015, some Gopher fans claimed Michigan was offsides on the final 4th down stuff. Steve agreed.

JMFJ Jack Mother-[Nice thinging] Johnson. Variants: JMFR for Jake Ryan, JMFH.

Johnny Jones Index: Sometimes used in place of the Bo Ryan Index. Percent of images on the first page of a google image search are of you at another job. Johnny Jones's Johnny Jones Index is 96%.

Lloyd Brady A fan with a distinctive bowl cut who always seems to be captured by the TV cameras in the front row, and is usually pretty happy looking.

Maizen. Infamous banned user who kept creating more accounts just to register his disdain for 3-stars.

Manbearfreak Carson Butler. A commenter or two still refers to Butler as "manbearfreak" or "MBF," which was confusing even to me until I looked it up. A conflation of "Manbearpig" from South Park and "freak," generally used to describe any unusually athletic specimen who plays football. Appears exactly once in the vast and multifarious MGoBlog archives:

Carson Butler. Manbearfreak.

Manball Manblocking and power running offense concepts predicated on pushing the defense out of the way to create lanes.

MANBALL (see Crimes Against Manpanda)

Miami (Yes That Miami) or Miami (YTM) the University of Miami in Florida is That Miami.

Miami (NTM) (Not That Miami), Miami University in Oxford, Ohio.

MIKE (verb) Cardinal rule of pass blocking assignments. Always MIKE before you hike.

M00N How the scoreboard read for most of the 2014 Michigan-Northwestern game:

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Monkey Rodeo An animated gif of monkey cowboys riding dogs, favored by livebloggers.

Mr. Plow Justin Boren, who was incensed that Rich Rodriguez wouldn't let him go back home on the weekends to help out with his dad's snowplow business. His whereabouts are currently unknown.

Muppets After important victories MGoBlog posts the Muppet Glee Club versions of "Temptation" and "Hawaiian War Chant", the two songs the band plays after wins.

Nachoshorts See Tacopants

Negbang Board jargon for excessive downvoting (antonym: "Posbang"). A person who posts an unpopular comment on the board and receives 50 negative votes or more can be said to be "Negbanged."

Never Forget … the erstwhile defensive backs of 2009-2010. Usually posted with the official banner:

never_forget12-18-2012_thumb_0

(The) New Math Nickname for Mario Manningham. Comes from post conveniently titled "The New Math" after the 2005 Penn State game. General implication is that 86 == 1 and Manningham is unpossible.

NSFMF Not so fast, my friend.

(NTM) or (YTM) or (NT[any letter/s]): See Miami (Yes That Miami)

NTTAWWT Not that there's anything wrong with that.

(nv) Nisi Vanderbiltum, a Latin shorthand for excluding Vanderbilt from blanket statements made about the SEC. Coined by Seth.

Patrick Ewing Index: Sometimes used in place of the Bo Ryan Index. Percent of images on the first page of a google image search are of you as a player.

Pax Specialistica: Like the Pax Romana, except instead of being a period when you could travel Europe without fear under the good emperors, it was a period when you could send out the special teams under Jake Moody and Brad Robbins without fear.

Positions: These are less MGoBlog-specific and general football terms, but I'll put them here until I've completed a football terminology glossary.

  • BS: Backside (on offense) or Backside Safety in referring to a player.
  • C: Center
  • DE: Defensive end
  • DT: Defensive tackle. Either a 4-3 DT or one of the DE/DT hybrids in a 3-4.
  • Edge: Outside linebacker who's a quasi-end. I use this because "weakside linebacker" could get confused with WLB which is an ILB position.
  • F: As an offensive position this means a tight end off the line of scrimmage.
  • FS: Free safety or "frontside" sometimes.
  • FB: Fullback.
  • G: Guard
  • H: Slot receiver
  • HSP: Hybrid space player. A walkout LB who's safety-like.
  • ILB: Inside Linebacker
  • LB: Linebacker
  • MIKE or MLB: Middle linebacker
  • N: Nose
  • Nk: Nickel. Usually means he's a full defensive back.
  • S: Safety.
  • SAM: Strongside linebacker or Strongside outside LB
  • SS Strong safety
  • T: Tackle. Usually offensive.
  • W or WLB or WILL: Weakside Linebacker, specifically the ILB who's not the MIKE 
  • X: Split end (wide receiver) on the weak side of the formation. An X is always on the line.
  • Y: Inline TE, or if there are two TEs off the LOS, the strongside one will be the Y and the backside one the F.
  • Y-Flex: A TE split out to the slot.
  • Z: The Flanker. May be on the line of scrimmage. In trips sets he's the widest WR.

Oakland is Still in Play for Jim Harbaugh because no amount of evidence will convince NFL beat writers a marketable pro head coach would take a college job.

OHIO! Ohio University in Athens, Ohio. In caps and punctuated to differentiate from how Brady Hoke referred to Ohio State.

OMG Shirtless Sometime during the 2005 recruiting year I received a number of hits for "Tim Tebow shirtless." At that point Tebow was a heavily pursued quarterback recruit and not Chris Leak's china-destroying sidekick. I endeavored to help this lonely, lonely person but could only find a picture of Tebow in a basketball jersey. Thus was born the Shirt Scale of recruiting rankings; these days it's about 50-50 as to whether or not a panting reference to a five-star freakystud gets tagged as shirtless, depending on whim.

OT: Off topic. Used in message board headers to denote something not related to Michigan sports, Big Ten, relevant college athletics, or University of Michigan/Ann Arbor things. (or just as often, something that is relevant).

Poor Damn Toussaint or Poor Damn [name] because we couldn't tell how good he is from the pile of nobody blocking around him. See 27 for 27.

Posbang see Negbang

(The) Process Dave Brandon's buzzword for why we needed seven weeks (OSU game to mid-January) of reveling in the Glory of Dave Brandon before firing the obviously fired Rodriguez and hiring the only guy Brandon ever considered whom he could have hired any time.

Rapture Guy Basketball fan who reached pinnacle of human capacity for happiness. Interviewed.

Rock. See RPS

RPS Rock, Paper, Scissors. UFR phrasing for what coordinators do against each other with play calling. Mike DeBord believed anything could be defeated by proper execution of rock. Good ol' rock.

Selling Jerseys in Ohio According to one blogger's eleventy-five posts and a thread's worth of copycats, there is no greater metric for gauging a coach's effectiveness than the Ohio clothing market.

SIAP Sorry if already posted. Message board header that shouldn't exist because if you posted something you have already diligently checked to see if someone else did so already.

Snowflakes Board header prefix for hot takes. We are all unique and special, like snowflakes, thus all of our special snowflake thoughts are unique and special and belong in Snowflakes threads.

Special K Kenny Fisher from Can't Hardly Wait, who graduated with a degree in having sex from UCLA and now makes music selections to pump out at Michigan home games, with consultation from Pepsi.

StAEE Their football team may be Big Daddy (see Big Daddy) but if there's one fanbase you would guess could misspell their own name when vandalizing a car...

Swampball A swampy game played by an angry, legalistic species of sentient bug people on a planet near Rigel. Virtually indistinguishable from Wisconsin basketball under Bo Ryan (origin).

Tacopants is Jason Avant's eleven-foot tall imaginary friend. Chad Henne spent much of 2005 hitting him between the numbers, which are unfortunately eight feet off the ground and made of dreams. Blessed with infinite eligibility and the ability to sneak on and off the field without alerting the referees -- made of dreams, remember -- Tacopants has taken a lesser role in the offense as Henne matures but still pops up at inopportune times. The term has its genesis in this post. Cousin Nachoshorts is three apples high and yet still too tall to grab turfed Steven Threet screen passes. 

UFR or Upon Further Review The painstaking play-by-play analysis of offensive and defensive performance after football games. A database of past UFRs is available in the User HoF.

Uniformz Alternate uniforms, not good ones.

Unverified Voracity Voracity is a weird word to come after "unverified," especially when dealing with a sports blog and not, say, a blog about rumored hunger. The deal: back when the sporadic link-filled posts were untitled, some Iowa sportswriter penned what was to the the first in a long line of intemperate columns ragging on blogs for having the audacity to not be written by sportswriters. Unfortunately for that sportswriter, she inserted the following sentence:

In the new "journalism of assertion," as the report calls it, information is offered with little time and little attempt to independently verify its voracity. [sic]

Sarcasm being what it is, UV was born shortly after.

VIPER(!): "Viper" is the hybrid safety/strongside linebackr position that Peppers played in 2016. We thought it needed to stand out more.

We Had Subs, It Was Crazy. Beilein endearingly describing the chaos of two grandkids' birthdays in two days between the Elite 8 and Final 4 weekends in 2013. Became a handy bit of nonsense to yell when this occurred:

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Win the Game! Mitch McGary's sage advice for beating MSU.

(The) Year of Infinite Pain is 2005, a time before we knew what pain was.

YMRMFSPA You may remember me from such players as. Used in recruiting profiles to say what kind of player a recruit may turn out to be if he works out.

(YTM) or (NTM) or (NT[any letter/s]): See Miami (YTM)